Part-3-Final-Part-of-my-story-for-Downs-Syndrome-Awareness-Week
Part 3 - Final Part of my story for Downs Syndrome Awareness Week
In November 1998 I said those joyous words “you’re what!” Yes she was pregnant AGAIN, I just don’t know how this keeps happening!
This time we were much more relaxed and had no intention of having any stupid tests, Duncan went to term and was born healthy on 7th August 1999 – 7/8/99, now his birthday I can remember no trouble. I also had the snip whilst Amanda was pregnant! So that was our family complete, 3 boys.
They say that “tragedy” either brings you closer together or rips you apart and I think that’s true, for Amanda and I it’s definitely the former, we had a great marriage and relationship but Jacob in particular changed our outlook and relationship for the better.
For our other two lads I believe that growing up with a … I was going to say disabled brother, but we wouldn’t describe him as disabled, growing up with a brother who is different has enhanced their lives, just recently we thanked Morgan who is now 19 for helping to make Jacob the person he is – his response, he said I’d like to thank Jacob for making me who I am. I also believe that Jacobs’ existence has enhanced the lives of my boys’ friends, spending time with Jacob and playing on the xbox or watching TV with him shows them that he isn’t a monster, something to be scared of or anything unpleasant at all, and that’s got be good. Jacob is his own man these days, he knows what he likes; Dr Who, films of all sorts, the other day he watched an adult horror film on Netflix followed by the Disney film Enchanted!
He doesn’t talk, which is his main “dis” ability, he is able bodied, pretty fit and very healthy, goes to college and works on our small holding along with other adults with Down’s Syndrome and similar conditions in a project we have setup. We wouldn’t have chosen to have a child with Down’s Syndrome, but now we wouldn’t change him even if we could, he has enhanced our lives and continues to enhance the lives of the people he meets, believe me, everyone loves Jacob.
This kind of sums it all up;
I Have a Special Needs Child Welcome to Holland by Emily Perl Kingsley
When you are going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make all your wonderful plans: the Coliseum, Michelangelo's David, the gondolas in Venice. You may even learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland." "Holland ?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy" But there has been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place. So you go out and buy new guide books. And you learn a whole new language. And you meet a whole group of people you would never have met. It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there awhile and you catch your breath, you look around and begin to notice Holland has windmills- and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts. But everyone one you know is busy coming and going from Italy...and they are all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned." And the pain of that will never, ever go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, and very lovely things about Holland.
Happy Downs Syndrome Awareness week friends Rob Phelps March 2014.
In November 1998 I said those joyous words “you’re what!” Yes she was pregnant AGAIN, I just don’t know how this keeps happening!
This time we were much more relaxed and had no intention of having any stupid tests, Duncan went to term and was born healthy on 7th August 1999 – 7/8/99, now his birthday I can remember no trouble. I also had the snip whilst Amanda was pregnant! So that was our family complete, 3 boys.
They say that “tragedy” either brings you closer together or rips you apart and I think that’s true, for Amanda and I it’s definitely the former, we had a great marriage and relationship but Jacob in particular changed our outlook and relationship for the better.
For our other two lads I believe that growing up with a … I was going to say disabled brother, but we wouldn’t describe him as disabled, growing up with a brother who is different has enhanced their lives, just recently we thanked Morgan who is now 19 for helping to make Jacob the person he is – his response, he said I’d like to thank Jacob for making me who I am. I also believe that Jacobs’ existence has enhanced the lives of my boys’ friends, spending time with Jacob and playing on the xbox or watching TV with him shows them that he isn’t a monster, something to be scared of or anything unpleasant at all, and that’s got be good. Jacob is his own man these days, he knows what he likes; Dr Who, films of all sorts, the other day he watched an adult horror film on Netflix followed by the Disney film Enchanted!
He doesn’t talk, which is his main “dis” ability, he is able bodied, pretty fit and very healthy, goes to college and works on our small holding along with other adults with Down’s Syndrome and similar conditions in a project we have setup. We wouldn’t have chosen to have a child with Down’s Syndrome, but now we wouldn’t change him even if we could, he has enhanced our lives and continues to enhance the lives of the people he meets, believe me, everyone loves Jacob.
This kind of sums it all up;
I Have a Special Needs Child Welcome to Holland by Emily Perl Kingsley
When you are going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make all your wonderful plans: the Coliseum, Michelangelo's David, the gondolas in Venice. You may even learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland." "Holland ?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy" But there has been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place. So you go out and buy new guide books. And you learn a whole new language. And you meet a whole group of people you would never have met. It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there awhile and you catch your breath, you look around and begin to notice Holland has windmills- and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts. But everyone one you know is busy coming and going from Italy...and they are all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned." And the pain of that will never, ever go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, and very lovely things about Holland.
Happy Downs Syndrome Awareness week friends Rob Phelps March 2014.
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